How does one overcome bipolar disorder and start living again?

There is no easy answer on how to overcome bipolar disorder, and re-enter life, as it were. But if you are the person experiencing bipolar disorder and asking this question, you've already got part of it licked. Often the most difficult aspect is accepting you've got the illness in the first place. It took me over four years to admit there might be an actual disorder. This doesn't mean the rest of the journey is a cakewalk though.

Here are three steps that might help you on your way and create a gentle action plan.

1. Self-acceptance is one of the keys that opens the doors of recovery. Learning to have a gentle compassionate attitude towards yourself and your progress, no matter how slow, will give you steam to carry on. Once self-acceptance has begun to grow, self-awareness can develop with much less resistance and self-criticism. For without the self-acceptance and self-love, honest and accurate self-awareness is impossible.
2. When I say ‘self-awareness' I mean it in a very practical way: become an expert in knowing your early warning signs – there are very subtle shifts before the big valley or mountain mania goes into full swing. Changes on the physical, emotional, intellectual, behavioral and even spiritual levels occur indicating something is afoot. Cultivate an attentive relationship with your body, your thoughts, your spirit. The sooner you notice discrepancies, the sooner you can jump into proactive action. What are your particular red flags?

   For example: I know I am heading for a down turn when I begin to sleep over my usual 8 hours and wake still fatigued and when I do wake, I cringe at the idea of having to get dressed and face the morning. This may not mean I will experience a full blown depression, but it does tell me to make sure I am doing all the things I know fortify my mental health and if I am not, to get my butt into gear and do them. Or if I find myself talking in rapid fire pace as soon as I wake, I know this could mean a possible mania or hypomania. So I take all the precautions I can: ensure I've taken my meds, tell my fiancé or my mom I've noticed a change and then watch myself very carefully to ensure my mood levels out. These are but a few preventative health measures I take. What works for you? And this does not mean averting the mood swing, it means making a commitment to taking care of yourself.

3. The third and final suggestion is to set minute goals in order to move out of your comfort zones. Not too far, mind you, but just enough to feel like you have accomplished something you didn't think was possible. This may require that you enlist the help of a friend or family member to do it with you or at the very least be a cheerleader.

The move away from the familiar does not need to be, and should not be drastic. No reason to have knee surgery when only your skin is scrapped. For example, if I have been isolating over the last few weeks, it doesn't mean I go out to that party. More realistically, it means I call an understanding friend. Someone I can phone who is comfortable with my depression, who doesn't try to ‘fix' me and my emotions; someone who accepts me as I am today.

It is in the small, but courageous act of calling that person that gives my inner spirit a small boost of confidence and moves me out the comfort zone of my habitual isolation.

Small, sure and steady steps will get you back into life. As I set and achieve these micro-goals, a phenomenon happens which I call the C.E.S.P.A. phenomenon:

C – Cumulative
E – Effect
S - of Small
P – Positive
A - Actions

As you make a series of healthy choices and taking new actions (the tinier the better) you begin, in ever so small and gentle ways, to live your life, regardless of how your mood is. You do NOT need to wait until you feel like it or want to. Feeling better results from doing healthier things, not the other way around.

For example: get up and have a shower as soon as you wake; instead of waiting until you have to go somewhere in public.

Or think one new thought today. Be willing to tell yourself ‘I am worthwhile' at least once during the day instead of the ‘I am a loser' mantra, commit to writing it in a journal.

You may still have roller coaster ride sized mood swings, but your actions declare to the universe you are ready, willing and able to move into recovery. And indeed you already are. Even in my most manic or desperate moods, when I made choices towards wellness – the world around me in at least on area of my life responded with care and concern. It doesn't mean you will find the right medication in a day, or have the perfect psychiatrist, or instantly feel better or your disability pension will magically be enough, but it means you are on your own side fighting for yourself. And that, in and of itself will draw resources and others to you who have your best interest at heart and slowly, slowly, as the grass grows, it will dawn on you, you have created a life, despite a serious illness. It takes patience and time, but it does happen with: self-love, self-awareness and tiny shifts towards healthier behavior.

Many good wishes for your journey.

Warmest, Victoria