I have been having problems for a long time. For 2-3 months I have no feelings I feel numb. I can not feel happiness when my kids do something good Or sadness like when my son broke his leg. I just feel numb. During that time I do have out burst yelling at mainly my boyfriend for no reason at all. Than after about 2-3 months of that I snap. I feel mad. Very Very mad. I cant stop it. After I blow up. The next day I feel all the feelings I had been missing all at once. I feel guilty about being the way I was and I feel so much love It hurts. I usually sit in my kids room when and cry and cry. I can not stop. I feel I am useless and that I would be better off dead. I am so sad that I imagine myself doing bad stuff to my self. this last around 3 to 4 days. Than for about a week I feel normal. I feel peaceful. and happy. I do not have a sex drive at all. I can not even do it without feeling guilty. I love my boyfriend he is very kind and generous but I do not like him touching me except to cutely. I hate being alone. I always have. I do not know what's wrong with me. I wrote you because I do not have enough money to go see someone. I have been like this senes I was 16. At work it is hard to concentrate. I need help. Please write me back.

Thanks,

Heather

Hello Heather,

Heather, I would recommend that you get into see your family physician as soon as possible and tell him or her what you have shared with me. I don’t know enough about your personal or family history to provide any kind of diagnosis, I do, however, encourage you to get some medical and counselling help. I do not know where you are from, however, here in Calgary, there are several organizations that provide couselling services on a sliding fee scale. That means that you pay only what you can afford to pay. I have found going to counseling very helpful in that it provides me someone to go and express my thoughts and feelings to so that I don’t keep them all bottled up inside.

I wish you all the best Heather

Much warmth,

Lisa